The TNT Gang + Tracy Morgan+Sarah Palin= Masturbation

When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong!

Rapist-Berger Song Shootin Up The Charts

You need the exposure just like Vick needs a dog.

Jeremy Piven calls Big Ben "Rapist-berger"

Maybe it's because Jeremy Piven is just a bitter Bears fan. Or maybe he's channeling Ari Gold. Either way, the caustic actor was filmed by TMZ sounding off on what he expects to be a pretty lame Super Bowl between Ben "Rapist-berger and the Cheese Heads."

While kicking it at the Sundance Film Festival, Piven aired his thoughts on this week's big game only to realize all too late that the whole thing was being recorded for posterity.

The bad news for Piven may not be that he comes off looking like a douche - after all, he has a long history of that and doesn't really seem all that bothered by it. The bad news may be that it does give Big Ben grounds for a defamation suit. After all, while Roethlisberger has been accused (twice), he's never actually been found guilty of rape.

While he's at it, Ben could toss these guys in with Piven.

Monday's Birthday Shout-out: Vernon Davis Goes Olympic!

San Francisco 49ers tight end Vernon Davis has been all over the NFL map during his relatively short career. From click-clacking his way into the league to inspiring Mike Singletary's epic "Can't win with 'em" speech to becoming a Pro Bowl tight end.

But it seems that he may still have an athletic dream he has yet to achieve - winning a gold medal. Since it doesn't appear that the International Olympic Committee will be adding football to their roster of sports anytime soon, he'll have to go a different route. Enter everyone's favorite (?) winter sport...curling! Yep, that bizarre combination of hockey, lawn bowling and janitorial work could be Davis' ticket to Sochi in 2014.

It's a good thing he's got four years, he's gonna need it.

Friday's Birthday Shout-out: Daunte Culpepper Commits a Recruiting Violation

Imagine a time when Daunte Culpepper could come to your door looking to recruit your son to play football at Central Florida. Then imagine seeing your son's picture splashed across every college football website in the country because he was illegally recruited by someone "representing UCF's athletic interests".

The first part was humorously re-enacted on "The George Lopez Show" complete with George doing his best Cecil Newton impression for Culpepper and Donovan McNabb. Other highlights include Daunte getting his roll on as well as taking a shot at McNabb's inability to win a Super Bowl. Perhaps because of his poor cardiovascular endurance?

NER Playlist: Green and Yellow

Music videos touting one of the Super bowl participants are as much a late January tradition as stories about oddballs at Super Bowl Media Day. Going all the way back to the 1985 Chicago Bears and the Super Bowl Shuffle, we have heard nearly an endless stream of songs designed to rally the fanbase while professing love for the home team.

Most of them suck. For instance, Seattle's ode to Matt Hasselbeck.

Even having a big name star write/produce/perform your team's song doesn't guarantee quality...Prince, anyone?

But there is hope...and it's the newest addition to the New Era Radio Playlist!

Grab yourself a drank, lay back and enjoy Pizzle and Prophetic's "Green and Yellow". It's fitting that a Super Bowl that features Wiz Khalifa's beloved Black & Yellow should have a song revamped to honor their championship game opponents.

Finally, a team-centric rap song without the Dr. Seuss lyrics and a respectable level of production for the accompanying video. Aah, how refreshing. Put on your Vince Lombardi glasses and "throw it up like bulimics do..."

Smell Like Kevin Love!

So far in his young NBA career, Kevin Love has made cameo appearances on Entourage and The Suite Life on Deck and gone ESPN (30-for-30) on the New York Knicks. But what hasn't Minnesota's newest superstar done? Well he hasn't played in an All-Star Game and he hasn't pimped his own fragrance.

Now he's trying to kill both birds with one stone. Behold the promo for Numb#rs by Kevin Love...

The 612 All-Star Collection that promotes and distributes Love's line of men's grooming products put together a pretty sharp looking website, complete with a dapper looking Love perfecting his vacant fashion model stare. But keep scrolling down and it turns into a promotional campaign for Love's All-Star candidacy. 

The timing for the fragrance is pretty good. With Valentine's Day just a couple of weeks away fellas, there's plenty of time for your lady to pick up a bottle or two. As for the All-Star timing...not so much. Despite a late swell of support from fans and writers, Love is still ninth amongst Western Conference forwards - a loaded position to be sure. But even if he can't be an All-Star, he'll at least smell like one.

Calling All Strippers: Dallas Needs You!

With just over a week until the kickoff of Super Bowl XLV, the American sporting public turns its lonely eyes to Dallas. While the Packers and Steelers will provide the main course for the week, it seems as though the city is a little low on appetizers.

According to TMZ, one strip club operator has put out the call for more dancers to make their way to DFW for some Super Stripping. From TMZ:

John Walsh -- the guy who runs Showtime Cabaret -- tells TMZ, his fine establishment employs 50 lovely ladies ... but he's in the market for another 100-120 lap dancers to get down for the big weekend -- STAT!

All told, Walsh (who shouldn't be confused with the host of America's Most Wanted) says that about 10,000 strippers may be needed to help service the 30 mile zone around Dallas. Looks like some of those early revenue estimates may need to be revised.

Jay Cutler Walking in L.A. with his Chica

This is the reason why he will not get any sympathy from Chicago Bears fans or Football fans period. He looks real injured doesn't he?

Antonio Cromartie Threatens to Smash Matt Hasselbeck's Face In

UPDATE: Hasselbeck says his (now deleted) original tweet was merely a joke. He apologized to Cromartie and added "DB's and QB's have a hard time getting along I guess, sometimes. lol"

Certainly a diplomatic way to keep the peace during this time of much-needed player unity, but it's hard to believe that Hasselbeck didn't mean at least a portion of what he initially said. It would be nice to see him stand by it. Cromartie threatening violence only gave credence to Hasselbeck's original statement. Now he's just been bullied into silence. All the while, the owners are sitting back like Montgomery Burns watching as their employees fight over scraps.

*******************************************************************

Earlier today, Michael David Smith at Pro Football Talk reported on a deleted Tweet sent by Matt Hasselbeck in which the Seattle Seahawks' quarterback took a shot a Jets' cornerback Antonio Cromartie, asking if the latter "knows what CBA stands for".

Hasselbeck's comment was likely in response to a profanity-laced tirade Cromartie made in regards to the pace of labor negotiations. From ESPN:

"To me, you need to stop bitching about it," the New York Jets cornerback said. "And if you wanna say you're gonna get into a room and meet and greet, and say you're gonna do what you need to do, then do it. Don't just talk about it."

Despite the tweet being deleted not long after it was spent, word of Hasselbeck's comment apparently made its way to Cromartie who took to Twitter to elevate the rhetoric a tad. Via Twitter:

@Hasselbeck hey Matt if u have something to then say it be a man about it. Don't erase it. I will smash ur face in.

The angry response only seems to reinforce what Hasselbeck's deleted tweet was implying. After Cromartie's interview made its way around, a large number of NFL players used nearly any media platform they could find - social or otherwise - to profess their faith in NFLPA leader DeMaurice Smith, knowing that any signs of a splintering union could give the owners even more leverage in the intensifying battle.

That was probably the biggest reason Hasselbeck immediately withdrew the comment. It's also the reason that Cromartie should be smart enough to know that he can't start a flame war on the Internet over something as meaningful to his professional future. Both Cromartie and Hasselbeck are free agents but can't begin discussing new contracts as long as the labor situation is unsettled, something that is undoubtedly frustrating for someone with a long list of financial obligations.

Brett Favre's Sister Busted For Meth Lab

Brett Favre's little sister Brandi Favre is up to no good as the 34 year-old has been arrested and charged for manufacturing Meth.
Cops told WLOX , “ We discovered a full lab in the bathroom; it was still cooking…”
You have to admit that this has been possibly thw worst year for the Favre name. Besides Brett keeping the media at his very lips for a story, he is getting more coverage now for all his dumb crap than his play on the field. We all have relatives that do things that we are not proud of, but because it is Favre’s sister it just doesn’t get any better. We can now add "Sister is a tweaker." to his Hall of Fame Speech.
You wanted the attention Brett, now you have it.

Thursday's Birthday Shout-Out: Billy Johnson and His White Shoes

If you were to say Devin Hester's name to a group of NFL punters while standing on the set of a old-timey Western, chances are one of them would throw you off the breakaway balcony. There's little doubt that Chicago's punt return specialist has caused fear and loathing amongst opposition special teams. It's also spawned a debate over who the greatest return men of all-time are.

Yet through all the Hesters, Dante Halls, Josh Cribbses and Brian Mitchells, one name is generally forgotten in the discussion. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Billy "White Shoes" Johnson.

Combining the skills of a Dante Hall with the showmanship of a Chad Johnson Ochocinco Johnson, White Shoes was one of the great characters of the NFL in an era that spawned a ton of them.

My lasting memory of Johnson will be the Hail Mary he caught to be the 49ers in 1983 while playing for the Atlanta Falcons. If only I could take Ed Hochuli back in time to over-officiate it into not being a game-winning touchdown.

New Era Radio Episode #14: It's Not Easy Being Green

On this week's exciting episode of New Era Radio...Marcas goes on a diet! The boys decide which classic hip-hop albums deserve a re-release. Oh, and they break down the NFC and AFC championship games (if you're into that sort of thing).

Clay Matthews Is Suave...And So Is His New Endorsement Deal

Is this hair better than...

First it was Bud Bowl. Then the Puppy Bowl and the Lingerie Bowl. Could we now be set up for the Hair Bowl, featuring Troy Polamalu and Clay Matthews?

According to CNBC's Darren Rovell, the Packers' stud linebacker with the flowing, blond locks has signed a one-year deal with Unilever to market a newly-formulated men's shampoo under the Suave brand. The contract includes appearances before and after the Super Bowl as well as a production day that could include filming a commercial. The deal allows Matthews to have his hair trimmed a bit, but he isn't allowed to shave it off for at least a year.

...this hair?

It's somewhat surprising that it took this long for someone to ink Matthews to a deal considering he may have the second most recognizable hair in the NFL combined with his rapid rise to stardom. And it's not like Matthews hasn't been trying to snag an endorsement deal.

From CNBC:

"I've been throwing it out there and just getting shunned," Matthews said on Monday. "I don't know what it is...America, I'm looking for a hair deal."

Well, Clay...congratulations. You've got it. Although he may want to walk across the way and shake hands with Polamalu. This all comes after the Steelers' safety had his hair insured for $1 million by Head and Shoulders back in August. It's hard to imagine that this would have been in the works without Matthews' team getting set to line it up against Polamalu's team in the Super Bowl. Nonetheless, kudos to Suave for making it happen.

Wednesday's Birthday Shout-Out: Vince Carter's Dunkstravaganza

Vince Carter's career has been like a box of Fruity Pebbles. Really fun to look at sometimes, pretty tasty but ultimately unsatisfying. Part of that lack of fulfillment has led Carter to his fourth team in Phoenix. It's fitting that one of the West Coast's retirement communities will likely be the place where he finishes out his career, free to wander in and out of games as he pleases with very little danger of dropping in on the rest of the family (aka, the playoffs).

It's even gotten to the point recently that, as Kurt Helin of Pro Basketball Talk pointed out, Phoenix is trying to coax the old Vince back into action.

Speaking of the old Vince, in honor of his 34th birthday, we take a look back to the days when he was still Half-Man, Half-Amazing by remembering The Greatest Individual Slam Dunk Contest Performance of All-Time (Timetimetime).

Some of the highlights include a cameo from cousin and fellow Fruity Pebbler Tracy McGrady and Carter placing half his arm the basket - a feat that continues to amaze me no matter how many times I see it.

Lions' Zack Follett Recants Stafford "China Doll" Comment, Piles on Jay Cutler Instead

Detroit Lions' linebacker Zack Follett recently appeared on KFIG radio in Fresno, CA and continued a recent theme of NFL players criticizing NFL quarterbacks. But in a surprising twist, it was his OWN quarterback that Follett decided to take a shot at, saying that Matthew Stafford is "a china doll right now".

Anytime he gets hit, he goes down. But the kid is — hopefully, it's just patiently waiting for him, because the kid is an awesome talent. He has a tremendous arm. The throws that he makes during practice when no one can touch him, he looks like an All-American quarterback. But put him in a game, and you hit his shoulder. 

Ouch. Not something you'd expect to hear from a player who's missed 15 games of his own in just two seasons in the league. In a subsequent interview with WXYT in Detroit, Follett clarified his statement and instead joined in America's newest pastime...bashing Jay Cutler.


Follett went on to say that he simply meant that Stafford had bad luck and that he'd rather have the former Georgia star than Cutler "because he (Stafford) goes in and plays with separated shoulders and wins games." Later in the interview, Follett compared Stafford to Dan Marino in terms of arm strength and accuracy.


Easy, big fella. We need to see a little more durability out of Stafford before we can start comparing him to anybody else around the league, let alone Hall of Famers.


Then again, this isn't the first time Follett has questioned the toughness of players around the league. On his website, "The Pain Train" (as he calls himself) stood in the feminine hygiene aisle of a supermarket and warned fans and opposing players that with him getting more playing time, it could be "a bloody mess".

By the way, Follett also says he makes life-sized cutouts of his teammates in plywood. You wonder if he thinks his carvings are tougher than some of the guys he plays with and against.


(H/T: Jim Verros)

Buy Tickets To Watch the Super Bowl...On TV! (Update)

*****************UPDATE*****************

As expected, tickets to Jerry Jones' Super Bowl viewing party are selling...and selling well. As of Tuesday, Party Plaza tickets on StubHub were selling for an average of $317 as as much as $791. The market was bearing similar prices over on Craigslist with some tickets going for as much as $625 apiece. Keep in mind that face value for tickets to the actual game begins at $600.

Just sayin'...

(H/T: Darren Rovell)

*****************UPDATE*****************

We now know how much fans will be gouged charged to watch the Super Bowl on television in front of Jerry Jones' gridiron palace.

According to Fox 4 Houston, for the low, low price of $200, you too can get passes to a special pavilion to watch a televised version of the game that will be going on in a building several hundred yards from you! Keep in mind that this is the same game that others will also be watching on television...for free.

Oh, and there will be live performances by the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders and some band called Reckless Kelly. The good news for Jones (besides getting people to pony up $200 for something they can generally get for free) is that the NFL has agreed to count these extreme tailgaters as part of the game's official crowd, helping him significantly on his quest to break the Super Bowl attendance record.

While I continue to think about how silly this idea is, I know there will be plenty of people lining up just to say they were there.

(H/T: Larry Brown Sports)

**************************************

If nothing else, you've gotta give Jerry Jones and the NFL credit for trying.

SportsDayDFW reported on Thursday that the Cowboys' owner along with the league is trying to figure a way to charge fans to watch the Super Bowl from outside Cowboys Stadium. No word just yet on how much tickets will cost and how they will be made available to fans. Presumably they won't reach the $600-$1200 face value of tickets to the actual game, but with space likely at a premium in a newly-created special viewing plaza, you can guess that they'll still cost a pretty penny.

Although this shouldn't be surprising in a league that charges fans full price to watch meaningless preseason exhibition games in which the stars may not play more than a quarter. Funny how Roger Goodell leaves that part out when he talks about making the game better for the fans.

While most fans will laugh at the idea of paying high ticket prices (plus parking charges, plus whatever the team/league may charge for concessions) just to watch a game on television, anyone who does decide to take the plunge will likely be better off than the poor souls who get stuck in The Worst Seats In Cowboys Stadium...

Good luck with that one! 

Tuesday's Birthday Shout-Out: How Chris Mills Got His Groove Back

Thanks to Chris Mills, you all get a special treat...namely an early addition to the New Era Radio playlist.

Last week, Jason Kidd helped us relive B-Ball's Best Kept Secret. Today, in honor 10-year NBA veteran Chris Mills' birthday, we proudly present another track from that same hip-hop classic album. Introducing "Sumptin to Groove To".

Sounding a touch like something from a Black Moon album, Chris lets us all know that he's a "fly girl layer". Not sure if that means he associates with attractive women in general or has carnal knowledge of one of Keenan Ivory Wayans former dancers.

Actually, the track ends up being a lot like his career. Starts with great potential, shows signs of going to the next level, but ends up being pretty mediocre. Either way, it's still better than the awful uniform he was forced to wear during his time in Cleveland.

Could the Longhorn Network's deal with Time Warner Cable Hurt UT's Non-Profit Status?

Mack Brown may hook a few more recruits

Right on the heels of Comcast's recent purchase of NBC Universal, the as-yet-unnamed Texas Longhorns television network may end up with some cable operator parentage of its own.

Sports Business Journal reported on Monday that Time Warner Cable is in talks to purchase as much as a 20 percent ownership stake in the new channel, set to launch in September. ESPN, which agreed to a 20-year, $300 million agreement with university will produce programming for the channel.

The announcement spurred huge reaction across the country with commentators wondering if this meant the beginning of the end of conference football as we know it or whether the school was running the risk of committing any number of potential recruting violations.

But a statement in the SBJ story may have an unintended impact on any similar deals going forward:

A deal with Time Warner Cable is essential for the unnamed channel’s distribution because TWC is the state’s dominant cable operator, with close to 2 million subscribers, according to Media Business Corp. In addition to being a UT corporate sponsor, TWC has wired the university for cable and broadband services, and it has a system that covers the state capital, Austin.

The immediate arguments are the complaints regarding lack of programming competition that many critics of the Comcast deal initially raised. Certainly with Time Warner Cable controlling such a large market share in the state of Texas and potentially having a vested interest in the success and visibility of Longhorn sports, there is reason for Texas A&M, Texas Tech and Baylor to be a touch worried about how much airtime they'll get.

UT AD Deloss Dodds is a game-changer

But a longer-term issue could be how the revenue gained by UT may be classified and whether it affects the school's nonprofit status. A May 2009 report by the Congressional Budget Office studied revenues earned by Division I universities - broken down in terms of commercial and non-commercial revenue and whether it came from inside or outside the athletic department - and aimed to determine whether the tax breaks many colleges received gave them an unfair advantage to pursue commercial interests.

The study concluded that at the Division I-A level, a number of athletic departments were closer to commercial enterprises than non-profit institutions of higher learning. However the CBO also stated that even though the continuation of such tax exemptions amount to a federal subsidy and could "encourage an 'arms race' between schools", most universities would be able to find loopholes that would enable them to avoid any real taxation through athletic department earnings.

Yet the CBO makes an evaluation that that might give pause to some ardent Bevo backers:

When athletic departments function primarily as a part of the educa­tional experience for students, they participate in that nonprofit market. However, highly competitive college sports teams with large-capacity stadiums and prime-time television events with advertising are more reasonably considered participants in the market for entertainment. They compete for entertainment spending with many other recreational options, but their most direct competi­tors are professional sports leagues.

UT has said its channel will feature non-sporting events like coverage of lectures and visiting speakers as well as commencement ceremonies. The same will likely apply to BYU's forthcoming network. While those academic appetizers provide some cover from critics, the main course that has networks and some cable operators salivating is football with men's basketball for dessert.

ESPN has already heard its share of criticism about becoming such a prominent partner with one school - a refrain the network has dealt with more often in recent years with their controversial coverage of supposedly "favored" athletes like LeBron James and Ben Roethlisberger. But with a cable distributor in the mix, the situation gets even stickier.

The Big 12 conference still has another year left on its deal with Fox Sports Net, meaning there will likely still be some even distribution amongst coverage of the competing schools. However, the ABC/ESPN contract runs through 2015-16. With ESPN and Time Warner being so closely tied to Texas, will fans of the rest of the conference see just enough of their teams to keep them from jumping to satellite?

If so, does that put Texas in direct competition with other university athletic departments? It's also a question that may be asked to a lesser degree of Notre Dame. Currently the Irish's deal with Comcast-NBC is for home football games only, but if the Longhorns' network proves to be profitable, you can bet Fighting Irish TV is sure to follow.

Here's the rub: Major League Baseball was granted an antitrust exemption allowing it to be a monopoly. The NFL enjoys a partial antitrust exemption. Still franchises in both of those leagues must still pay taxes. If a university is allowed to keep it tax exempt, non-profit status yet run its athletic department as a business it creates a competitive imbalance not just for the other schools in its respective conference or region, but for other entities competing for the same entertainment dollar.

If Texas, Notre Dame, BYU or potentially Oklahoma (which is reportedly pursuing its own TV deal) can claim much of the same advertising, ticket and merchandising revenue as the New York Yankees or Dallas Cowboys, should they also be able to solicit donations from boosters with the added incentive of making those donations tax-deductible?

I'm in no way advocating for Congress to get involved with legislating television contracts for college sports. Goodness knows they have far more important things they need to spend their time on. But with fans clamoring for the NCAA to take a closer look at its model of big revenue schools making billions off amateur athletes and consumers concerned about media consolidation narrowing wide market access, this could be a story to keep an eye on.

Jay Cutler Went Out Like A Punk Bitch!

Some NFL players went to Twitter to show their discuss for Chicago Bears QB Jay Cutler going out like a sucka in the NFC Championship game vs. The Green Bay Packers.


Here’s a Twitter sample of some of the reaction:

Maurice Jones-Drew: “All I’m saying is that he can finish the game on a hurt knee … I played the whole season on one …”

Asante Samuel: ‘If he was my teammate I would be looking at him sideways. … I luv my QB @mikevick he has the heart of a lion. I guess others are scared of success.”

Kirk Morrison: “If my knee was hurt or acl/mcl/pcl sprain, I would not be standing up on the sideline.”

Darnell Dockett: “If I’m on chicago team jay cutler has to wait till me and the team shower get dressed and leave before he comes in the locker room!”

These Tweets game before we new that Cutler hurt his MCL.

The problem that I have with Cutler is that he should've been dragged off the field with a stretcher looking like he was hit by a snipper from the clock tower in Higher Learning. Malik should have run to his aide and then gone after Aaron Rogers. You dont stand on the sideline and not helping your 2nd and 3rd string QB's at all.

Monday's Birthday Shout-Out: Scott Kazmir's Awesomely Bad Cartoon

Scott Kazmir's professional career hasn't quite gone the way a lot of people imagined. Sure he's been a two-time All-Star and was the American League's strikeout champion in 2007, surely nothing to sneeze at but not what the Tampa Bay Devil Rays were hoping for when they traded for him back in 2004.

But that's not to say that the Rays didn't get something awesome out of Kazmir. Namely a comically-bad, but sickeningly entertaining cartoon series titled "Defenders of the Game". Used as in-stadium entertainment during the 2007 season, it featured Kazmir, Rocco Baldelli and Carl Crawford as a trio of superheroes with Joe Maddon and Don Zimmer as their Yoda-like mentors.

Feast your eyes on Part Three of their incredible origin story...

Wow. Looks like the LeBron James cartoon has a lot to live up to.

The "Defenders" fight such evil foes as The Umperor, a maniacal Enrico Palazzo and Dr. Stats, an over-officious SABRmetrician. But considering the Rays finished 30 games below .500 that year, they would have been better served to concentrate their powers on the Yankees and Red Sox. 

The next season, Baldelli was evicted from the Clubhouse of Justice because of an extended stay on the disabled list. In his place, the Defenders added Carlos Pena, James Shields and B.J. Upton, which wasn't good for the fans since Upton never seemed gung-ho about chasing down anything evil hit into the gaps.

Down Goes Shuman..Down Goes Shuman

Video is long but the expressions at the end is classic. Fast Forward to 2:00 min in.

Ike Taylor Lays Bounty ON Holmes

Ike Taylor: I'll Lay Santonio Holmes Out
By FanHouse Staff
Ike Taylor apparently didn't get the memo that this week's matchup between the Steelers and Jets isn't personal.

A week after the NFL warned teams that any trash talking before games would be considered when judging discipline for illegal hits, Taylor spoke about former Steeler teammate Santonio Holmes, who will be playing his former team for the second time this season.

Though Taylor said he's still friends with Holmes, he said he is going to "try to be as disrespectful as possible" when the teams take the field, saying, "friendship doesn't enter into it then."

"I'm not going to hesitate to lay him out," Taylor said. "No question at all. You know why? Because he ain't going to hesitate to crack on me if he gets a chance

Earlier in the week, Holmes downplayed the matchup.

"I think the personal game is out the way. I got a chance to beat them the first time around," he said in reference to the 22-17 Jets win over the Steelers in Week 15.

"This time it means everything for the team, for the organization ... I don't care about the Steelers right now. Those guys are in my team's way. We have one goal -- to win the Super Bowl."

"Everything personal, will happen two, three weeks after," he continued. "If we win the Super Bowl, then everything is personal, that's a slap back in those guy's face for trading me. For right now, that's not even a focus of mine."

T-Mobile Blocks Text While Driving

For those of us who don't have the willpower to decline calls or text when we are behind the wheel, T-Mobile has a way for us to do it!!

To stop cell phone users from driving dangerously, T-Mobile has unveiled a new service that AUTOMATICALLY disables most texting and calling features when a phone senses that it is in motion.

When activated, the DriveSmart Plus application determines how quickly a phone is switching between cell phone towers. When it senses that the phone is moving faster than 10 MPH, within a few minutes, it automatically sends phone calls to voicemail or a hands-free Bluetooth headset (Depending on which version the customer selects) and sends text messages to a user's inbox. Depending on the phone, the application can also disable audible alerts so that the driver isn't even aware of incoming messages.

DriveSmart Plus is not the first smartphone application to attempt to block on-the-road calls and texts. While other cell phone carriers say they are working on similar kinds of technology, T-Mobile's service is the first carrier-backed service to hit the market.

This $4.99 per month application, developed by the Emeryvill, Calif. company Location Labs, will be available to T-Mobile customers with Android smartphones.

Next they should develop an app. to block picture text from married football players sending texts to numbers other than their wives when it senses that there is a penis in the photo!

Just a thought!...

NER Playlist: Jason Kidd Drops Dimes...On The Mic!

In his 17th season in the NBA, it's easy to say that Jason Kidd isn't the player he once was. Which is why for the first edition of the New Era Radio Playlist, we're going back...way back.

All the way back to 1994 when J-Kidd was an emerging star out of Cal on his way to sharing Rookie of the Year honors with Grant Hill. That was also the year Epic Records released "B-Ball's Best Kept Secret" - a compilation album that paired NBA stars with top hip-hop artists. It was a landmark album that paved the way for artists like Delonte West to freestyle at a KFC drive-thru.

Because who wasn't eager to hear Dana Barros, Dennis Scott and Chris Mills drop a rhyme in the mid-90s? But the song that stuck with me was Kidd's gem featuring Digital Underground's Money B (another East Bay product). A smoothed out G-funk style anthem reminiscent of Snoop Dogg's classic "Ain't No Fun", Kidd tells us all about his ability to give assists "like a high school tutor". But that's just the beginning of this nearly four-minute lyrical layup drill. Several of the highlights:

• Kidd touts his ball-handling skills ("Good on the dribble like an infant...")
• He addresses untruths ("Surrounded by rumors like the Timex Social...")
• Contains very likely the only rap reference ever made to former Cal basketball coach Lou Campanelli.

Enjoy your Friday, y'all...

Brett Favre -"What Should I Do"

I Can really see this happening.

Strip Club Owner Banking On Bears-Jets Super Bowl

With the NFL set to host its AFC and NFC Championship games on Sunday, football fans are deciding which of the four possible Super Bowl matchups would be the most entertaining. While this is one of those years in which the NFL wins either way (four great football markets with large, rabid fanbases and great storylines), it appears that a Dallas-area strip club operator has his wallet heart set on seeing two particular teams get there.

Eric Langan, CEO of Rick's Cabaret says a Chicago Bears-New York Jets Super Bowl could mean a boost of up to $2 million for his clubs in the DFW area. From Reuters:

"We estimate, worst case, it will be about an additional $1 million in revenue for us," he said in a telephone interview, adding the company did about that much extra during the Super Bowl in Miami last year.

"But if we get a New York-Chicago Bears Super Bowl, then it could be really big," Langan added, citing the size of the cities. "We could be as high as $2 million."

It's no secret that hosting a Super Bowl is a huge financial boost to the local market. Hotels, restaurants, bars, taxi cabs all see a major boost in revenue for the week that the entire American sporting public focuses its beer-goggled gaze at the lucky city. You can add strip clubs to that list as well. But only $1 million last year? In Miami? C'mon, sports fans. You can do better than that. It's even more disappointing when you consider the women of Rick's picked the Saints to win it all.

Then again, Langan knows what he's talking about. According to a 2008 profile in Forbes Magazine, Rick's was (literally) a heartbeat away from setting up shop inside Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas which would have been the first gentlemen's club ever inside of a casino along The Strip. Which, come to think of it, would have been the perfect name for the place.

Forget Bart Scott's "Can't wait!", it appears that Rick's Cabaret has thrown down the gauntlet to you, Packer and Steeler fans. Are you really willing to be outdone by the depravity of New Yorkers and Chicagoans? Are you ready to prove that you can spend thousands of dollars one at a time? We know you can handle snow, but are you willing to make it rain? We await your answer.

Today's Birthday: Peyton Hillis Eats A Razorback

Cleveland Browns running back Peyton Hillis was undoubtedly one of the breakout stars of the 2010 NFL season (much to the chagrin of Josh McDaniels). After spending his college years behind Darren McFadden and Felix Jones at Arkansas, "The Avalanche" took full advantage of his chance to shine, rushing for 1,177  yards and 11 touchdowns.

Hillis recently told The Dan Patrick Show that part of his motivation came from opponents who made an issue of his skin color on the field. It apparently fired him up enough to skew fantasy football trade values across the country.

Nonetheless, this "country boy from Arkansas" has become a rock star along the shores of Lake Erie. In fact, he's apparently become a big enough celebrity that he earned a cameo on teammate Scott Fujita's weekly web series and has a surf-n-turf style sushi roll named in his honor.

Happy Birthday, Peyton Hillis. Thanks for sinking me in Week 12.

Jose Canseco Getting Juiced For Softball

It's been some time since we heard from Jose Canseco. But the former slugger-turned-author-turned-MMA reject resurfaced on Twitter Thursday announcing he has a new deal in the works.

Via Twitter:

Just sign a softball contract with a company named bass They will produce my first softball bat called juiced It Will be out soon

Yes, you read that right. Jose Canseco will have a softball bat called "Juiced". While it's the name of Canseco's book that led to the beginning of the end of the Steroid Era, it's also the black mark that has made the former 40-40 man persona non grata amongst many baseball fans. It's puzzling why he would want to constantly remind people of that instead of trying to rehab his image.

In an earlier tweet, Canseco says he's "completely steroid free", which makes this even more of a name fail. Sadly, Canseco is probably remembered more for being the face that launched a thousand investigations (in which case, it works all too well). Either that or having a home run bounce off his noggin.

Bass doesn't list much about itself on the company website and carries a pretty limited amount of equipment and apparel, leading you to believe it's relatively new. From a business standpoint, this deal seems like a low risk proposition. Considering the number of marketing opportunities Canseco has aligned himself with since his MLB career ended - he now says he's been testing anti-aging products for the last three years - it seems as though his asking price is pretty reasonable. If nothing else, Jose's infamy is probably worth a few looks from the curious.

It's something of a strange move for Canseco, who hasn't totally given up on his baseball dreams. In 2006, he appeared in the independent Golden Baseball League where he played for the San Diego Surf Dawgs (who at one time also had Canseco's former A's teammate Rickey Henderson) before being traded to the Long Beach Armada. He was last seen playing for the Laredo Broncos of the independent United League along with his twin brother, Ozzie. In his first at-bat with the team last September, he reminded everyone of what he once was. It's not exactly Roy Hobbs, but for a kid who grew up cheering for the Bash Brothers of the late 1980s, it's closer to the way I'd prefer to remember Canseco.

Bart Scott Invites Patriot Pat To Have A Beer

The legend of New York Jets' linebacker Bart Scott continues to grow. It began after his epic postgame interview with ESPN's Sal Paolantonio after New York's win over New England last Sunday. The rant has now expanded to include a tongue lashing of square-jawed mascot Patriot Pat.

According to ESPN's Johnette Howard:

“I was actually over there cussing out the [New England Patriots] mascot, the one with the big chin,” Scott explained Wednesday. He recalled “YEAH! Go home and drink some Sam Adams”

It makes me wonder if Scott had a series of regional beer-related blasts for all of the Jets' potential postseason opponents. If New York wins on Sunday, perhaps he'll invite Steelers fans to cool off with a refreshing Iron City Beer. Maybe offer Bears fans a frosty Old Style or suggest Packers fans crack open a High Life.

In Bart Scott's words..."Can't wait!" for Sunday.

If (somehow) you haven't seen Scott's WWE-worthy postgame rant in its entirety.

Today's Birthday: Spying On David Eckstein

Not all that long ago, David Eckstein was a World Series MVP, picking up his second ring playing for the St. Louis Cardinals. But as "Just Enough" turns 36 today, we take a look back to his younger days. Back when a fresh-faced young shortstop had just won his first World Series trophy patrolling the middle infield for the Anaheim Angels.

So what does one do after helping lead a perpetually star-crossed franchise to its first ever World Series title? Make a cameo appearance on She Spies, of course. While the acting chops of teammates Scott Spiezio and Adam Kennedy are hard to deny, it's Eckstein's deft use of props that puts the piece over the top.

It's really no surprise that Eckstein would choose being an EMT as a side hustle. I mean, we're talking about a guy voted "Most Helpful" in his high school graduating class.

Looking back, it's hard to tell what the best part of that epic 40-episode series was. The cameos by acting legends like Stuart Scott and local LA news personalities Fritz Coleman and Fred Roggin. Or the totally believable fight scenes.

MMmmmMMm!! Lion Taco's!!

Okay, so I'm all with trying new things and embracing other cultures, but I'm not sure that I can get excited to throw a Lion Meat Taco Tuesday!

Well...

A Tucson, AZ taco restaurant that has already has served up python, alligator, elk, kangaroo, rattlesnake and turtle are willing to do just that!.

Yes, Ladies and Gentlemen! Lion meat is now on the menu!!

Boca Tacos y Tequila says it's accepting prepaid orders for African lion tacos, to be served starting Feb. 16. Orders must be placed by Feb. 7 and owner Bryan Mazon says there are already a few reservations from curious customers.

Mazon says his restaurant started offering exotic tacos on its menu every Wednesday about six months ago and has tried "just about anything we can get our hands on."

According to the Food and Drug Administration, lion and other game meat can be sold as long as the species isn't endangered.

The Arizona Daily Star says most of Boca's exotic tacos range between $3 and $4. The lion tacos will cost $8.75 apiece.

Hey, if thats your thing, I'm not mad at you! I think I will just stick with Beef, Chicken, Steak, Fish, Shrimp and my favorite... Turkey tacos!

New Era Radio: Episode (Lucky) #13

This week we predict the winners of Packers/Bears and Jets/Steelers, try to figure out who's to blame for the hold-up in the Carmelo Anthony trade and pray that we're not allergic to semen. You'll just have to listen.

HS Wrestler Expelled For "Butt Drag" Move

Courtesy: Fresno Bee

The Clovis (CA) Unified School Board has voted unanimously to expel a Buchanan High School senior wrestler who was accused of sexual battery after using a wrestling move deemed to be legal, according to the Fresno Bee.

Attorneys for 17-year old Preston Hill says the move, called the "butt drag" is legitimate. The issue began when Hill practiced the move on a freshman teammate during practice. The maneuver involves inserting one's fingers into an opponent's anus in order to gain leverage.

The father of the unidentified freshman brought sexual battery charges against Hill, whom the father says went too far with the move as retaliation against the boy who stood up to Hill's bullying.  In the meantime, Hill is being home schooled while awaiting a criminal trial, which is scheduled to begin on January 27.

There is a precedent for such a lawsuit. In 2007, then 17-year old Jerome Hunt was found guilty of rape and sentenced to probation after using the move on at least six other wrestlers.

Lil Wayne Is Mad At LeBron James & Dwyane Wade

Would you be eager to talk to this man?

Add one more to the growing list of people pissed off at LeBron James.

This time it's recently-freed rapper Lil Wayne, who told Rolling Stone magazine that he's upset because James and Dwyane Wade, aka two of The Heatles, wouldn't say hello to him when he sat courtside at a recent Heat/Hornets game in New Orleans.

"Them n****s never speak to a n****," he says. "They don't chuck me the deuce or nothing. N**** spent all that money on them f****** tickets ... Come holla at me. We sit right by them little b****-ass n****s. At least come ask me why I'm not rooting for you."

Um...yeah. I'm sure they're eager to figure out why you're not rooting for them. It's probably the same reason that pretty much everyone outside of South Florida isn't rooting for them. I'm now eagerly awaiting the LeBron James response where he talks about his plans to go to a Lil Wayne show and tell Weezy why he'd rather listen to The Dream.

Jeff Van Gundy, It's Your Birthday...

...we gon' sip Bacardi like it's your birthday!

On second thought, maybe you've had enough.

Agnieszka Radwanska Loses racket

Every man needs a womens grip like this!

Ron Artest REALLY Loves In-N-Out Burgers

I need a Double-Double, Animal Style. NOW!

For the second time this month, the NBA has rescinded a technical foul called against a Los Angeles Laker. This time, it's Ron Artest who was T'd up after the Lakers and Clippers got into a shoving match late in their game on Sunday. The decision means Ron-Ron gets to hold onto $4,000 he otherwise would have been fined if the technical remained in place. What does that mean to Artest? Lunch, of course.

"I could've bought 10,000 In-N-Out Burgers," Artest told the L.A. Times. "I rather would've done that than give it away. I'm going to get 10 burgers [after Monday's game]. I love In-N-Out. It's addicting. It's the only reason I'm here in L.A. If it wasn't for In-N-Out Burger, I probably would've gone to Memphis or something."

Really? That's all it took to get him to Los Angeles? Somewhere Donald Sterling is tearing his hair out wondering how the Lakers get all the breaks. Well, we're sure he would be tearing his hair out if we believed he was ever paying attention to anything that happens in the NBA. Meanwhile, everyone else in Los Angeles is busy trying to figure out exactly which In-N-Out sells 40-cent hamburgers.

Looks like the Lakers nutritionist is back on the case. And after they'd gotten Lamar Odom's sweet tooth under control...

A.C. Slater Gets Smashed At An Illinois Bar

Who ever would have thought that the gang from Bayside High could ever cause a ruckus in a bar? Then again, who ever thought the gang from Bayside would ever be prominently featured in a bar? (Ignore that Elizabeth "Jessie Spano" Berkley was legally able to drink by the time the show taped its final episode.)

But such was the case last week in a Chicago-area bar when a (presumably drunk) customer flew into a rage after seeing a picture of curly-headed faux jock A.C. Slater on the wall. The owner of Mullets Sports Bar & Grill had to call police after a patron allegedly removed a framed picture of Slater from the wall above a urinal and destroyed it by throwing it on the floor, later telling the owner "I just don't like Slater."

I have so many questions about this. First...you named your sports bar "Mullets"? Although, if you're going to go that route, you probably should have a picture of A.C. Slater. Second, you framed your picture of A.C. Slater?

Finally, you have to wonder what kind of person would have such a visceral reaction to seeing Slater's smiling face in a bar? My guess is it's a grown-up, down on his luck Zack Morris still stinging from the ass-whooping he took back in high school.

Sorry 'bout your luck, Preppy!

Sacramento Kings' Arena To Be Named After Scam Product

Power Balance apparently can't brighten DeMarcus Cousins' disposition

For years now, the Sacramento Kings have been looking for a new arena to replace their current 23-year old venue, even exploring at times the possibility of a move to Las Vegas.

Instead, they have tried the next best thing - change the name and hope everyone thinks you've moved. After playing in two different buildings known as Arco Arena since their move from Kansas City in 1985, the Kings will now welcome fans and opponents to the new Power Balance Pavilion.

That's right, the Kings have signed a naming-rights deal with the nifty little bracelets that claim to prevent you from tipping over when you're pretending you're little teapot. Perhaps it's to stop Sacramento from being pushed around by just about every team in the league.

The deal comes in the wake of a class-action lawsuit being filed against the makers of Power Balance after the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission raised some doubts about the validity of the product's claims. Power Balance hasn't been helped by reports that the company itself admitted that the product was a scam. However, on its website, Power Balance stands by its initial claims that its products are effective.

Regardless of the lawsuit's outcome, I'm sure this will be a long, profitable partnership for both sides. Look at some of the other epic stadium naming rights deals. Who could imagine the Astros playing anywhere but Enron Field? Or the Titans outside of Adelphia Coliseum? And certainly no one walks into Land Shark Stadium expecting to beat the Dolphins. There's no way this can backfire, right?

(H/T: Gawker)

Kyle Turley Wants Brady Hoke To Lose Every Game

Here's looking at you, Kyle. Uh, I don't think so.

Now that Brady Hoke has made the move to the University of Michigan, it's safe to say that most people at San Diego State are sad to see him go.

In the case of Kyle Turley, that doesn't quite cover it.

The former Aztec and NFL player told XX 1090 radio in San Diego about a less than cordial text message he sent Hoke after the coach announced he'd be donning the Maize and Blue.

"I texted the guy, this is exactly what I said: 'I understand what you've got to do for you and yours but just the same … I hope you lose every damn game. That was a b.s. move, brother, and you know it.'"

During his NFL career, Turley was never known as a player who would hold his tongue on issues, so it's not shocking that he'd be quick to light up a guy he believed betrayed his alma mater. After all, he recorded an album titled "Anger Management". But with San Diego State set to make a trip to the Big House next season, it will be very interesting to hear what Turley may have to say leading up to that week's game.

Worst. Fight. Ever.

I know that Canadians have a reputation for being mild-mannered and polite. But after watching this *ahem* fight between two "men" on a train platform in Ontario, even the most hardened Canuck would have to hang their head in shame watching this.

And the winner is...

Um...I think we just declare them both losers.

(H/T: Guyism)

Ch-ch-ch-chia!

Yesterday, I mentioned that the Oakland A's are giving away MC Hammer bobblehead dolls as part of an '80s Night promotion. Today comes word that the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim have upped the ante with a Rally Monkey Chia Pet giveaway.

August 23rd against the Chicago White Sox, the Angels will combine lazy man's horticulture with what could be America's most annoying mascot (you're not totally off the hook, Stanford Tree). Considering Chia Pets have been made in the likenesses of Scooby Doo and Barack Obama, it shouldn't really be a surprise that a Major League team would jump on the bandwagon.

After watching so many players slip during last night's BCS Championship game in Glendale, I'm waiting for the introduction of the Chia Football Field.

Freddie Mitchell To Appear On "Millionaire Matchmaker"

Full disclosure. I detest reality television. If there's nothing else we've learned from the past decade of giving random jackasses their own shows it's that people will do or say most anything for money and/or attention. For all of the shows like Extreme Home Makeover or The Biggest Loser that attempt to actually help people, they're outweighed by shows like Bridalplasty that make me lose my faith in humanity. For that reason, I don't watch any of them.

But every so often, I find a reason to break my own rules. Tonight on Bravo just might one of them.

Judging by Freddie Mitchell's past alleged financial issues and his YouTube diatribes that appear to have been recorded somewhere in the Everglades, I'm guessing the word "Millionaire" is being used loosely. I'm just hoping that the matchmaker asks Freddie what he thinks is great about himself so he can go on for five minutes about his hands.

Enter To Win A Chance To Hear Brady Hoke Talk Up Mexican Michigan?

Come on down! You're the next fan on Michigan Names A Head Coach!

Every major college football program in the country has more than just a touch of arrogance surrounding it. After all, if you don't tell everyone you're the best, who the hell will? (Except Notre Dame, of course. That's what NBC is for...)

Which makes Michigan's raffling of a seat at their next head football coach's introductory press conference either fitting or amusing, depending on your point of view. In an era where coaches are hired to be fired, you can ask how Michigan is arrogant enough to gatekeep at an event that happens at most colleges slightly more often than Presidential inaugurations. Or you can giggle at the fact that the historically successful Wolverines have tried to drum up more interest in their sputtering program by turning a media event into a sweepstakes.

Meanwhile, Brady Hoke has been hired as the man to stand behind the podium and address the lucky winner (and presumably a few other invited members of the media). A couple of seasons ago, Hoke led Ball State to their first ever Top 25 ranking and an spot in the GMAC Bowl. And if you were to believe his appearance with Ball State alum David Letterman, his *ahem* shrewd scheduling choices may have had a hand in the team's success.

If only RichRod had considered coaching in his underwear. It at least would have taken the focus off of his porous defense.

BCS Title Game Offers Up More NCAA Hypocrisy

As Auburn and Oregon prepare to play for a BCS Championship and talk of Cam Newton's suspect recruitment and eligibility crank up as one of the game's subplots, the good people of the NCAA continue to spit in the eyes of every college football player and fan.

Here is it, the BCS edition of the Cam Newton jersey for sale at a souvenir stand in Glendale, Arizona before the game for $125 a pop. 

Somewhere A.J. Green is beating his head against a wall.

(H/T to Clay Travis)

MC Hammer Bobblehead Night Coming To Oakland

As we close in on the start of Spring Training (34 days and counting!) we start to see teams around the league unveiling their promotional schedules for the year.

While few Major League teams can match the greatness of "Nobody Night" or Pre-Planned Funeral Night, the Oakland A's have come up with an idea that might be legit.

Too legit to quit, in fact.

MC Hammer Bobblehead Night.

Sunday, July 17th against the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim, the A's are celebrating the 1980s by giving away springy-necked miniatures of the former A's ballboy-turned-rapper-turned-pop culture punchline.

Not to be picky or anything, but good ol' Stanley Burrell was a batboy from 1973 until 1980. And while he did have his first two major album releases in the late '80s, the bulk of his fame came in the early '90s with Please Hammer Don't Hurt 'Em and Too Legit To Quit. Not exactly an '80s staple.

And since the game is still six months away, there's still time for British Knights to jump in as a sponsor.

Marshawn Lynch + Beast Mode + Tecmo Bowl = Genius!

Saints fans...look away!

But for the rest of us, what better way to enjoy Marshawn Lynch's epic touchdown run to sink New Orleans than with added sound effects from the greatest sports video game of all time - Tecmo Super Bowl!